So the Christmas tree is going up in a couple of months and I’m absolutely dreading putting up the tree. This year we’ve a toddler and a wobbler and neither of them give a rats what I say. I can just see the boy climbing it like last year and the wobbler and swinging one-handed laughing at me like Chucky the Clown. I’m considering all of these Christmas tree hacks again…
1. Hang the tree upside down from the roof.
2. Have a bare tree with no decorations.
3. Surround tree with an electric fence.
4. Decorate top half of tree.
5. Secure toddler in handcuffs.
6. Put tree in a playpen.
7. Move toddler and wobbler out until after Christmas.
8. Put toddler and wobbler into a cage.
9. Get a wall decal Christmas tree.
10. Install the largest most secure fence you have ever seen.
11. Decorate the tree with things that the toddler dislikes like pictures of bedtime and vegetables.
12. Secure tree to wall with 6378 ropes, chains, and cable ties.
13. Wrap tree in cling film.
14. Get a tree with a really really really long trunk.
15. Not bothering to put up a tree at all.