Here is a list of things said to me in the past few weeks that I couldn’t help but just laugh at. I get that most of the time people are just being conversational when it comes to baby talk but seriously sometimes people should really think about what they’re saying.
When are you having the next one?
While the current newborn smell and cuddles are amazing and more is awfully tempting, three kids is the best contraception I have ever had. There will be NO more. Ever!
Is she sleeping though the night yet?
Ahhh your spoiling her…
For almost forty weeks my baby was in a confined space held by me, only me. So if my baby finds comfort adapting to her new world and surroundings by constantly being held that is fine by me. You can never spoil a baby, EVER!
Before you know they’ll be moving out and going to college.
Okay so you have come into MY home, you’re robbing MY cuddles and now you’re reminding me it won’t last forever. Just give me my baby back already. Wehhh!
Are you sleeping when baby sleeps?
And exactly who will be looking after the other kids, cleaning, cooking, doing school runs?
Oh would you look at that, baby is sleeping… I know you have only arrived but it’s time for you to go so I can eh ‘sleep when baby sleeps’.
You look exhausted!
Why, just why?
Is she a good baby?
If I had a euro for every time someone asked this question I’d be getting my butler to type this for me on my yacht in the south of France somewhere.
Every baby is a good baby because THEY’RE BLOODY BABIES!
Back in my day…
Yeah yeah, I know, you did EVERYTHING differently. Just shut up already!